Knowing and Seeing
by emebalia
Summary: Bobby knows and it's about time to let them know. In his own way. Wincest, established relationship, nothing more explicit than kissing.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** This story is totally lilykep's fault. She encouraged me to write it in the first place, helped me to smoothen the edges and then convinced me to publish it. So here it is, thanks gal.

* * *

**Knowing and Seeing**

Bobby ended the phone call and took a deep breath. That was it. No turning back now. Even if he wanted to back off, and a huge part of him wanted to do just that, it was too late. It had taken him two full days to set up the room, one for throwing out the old stuff and one for getting the new stuff in, and now it was too late to change his mind. They would be there in about an hour.

"Hope they don't just bolt." Bobby muttered and busied himself with chopping onions. Maybe he could get a good hot meal into them before the big bang. And it would be a big bang, he had no doubt about that.

Showing had worked with the Winchesters, any Winchester, always better than telling. Stubborn asses, all of them, who shut their mouths tight as if you were about to pull their teeth. As if talking hurt. So showing it was. Bobby let out a sigh.

When about an hour later the familiar growling of the Impala came down the driveway, Bobby adjusted his cap, took a deep breath, he was doing that a lot lately, and put his best poker face on. Then he opened the door.

"Hey, Bobby." Sam greeted him and unfolded himself out of the passenger seat. He moved stiffly and with his right arm he was protecting his ribs. On the other side of the car Dean got out and flashed Bobby a warm smile. Or as much of a smile he could manage with half of his face pretending to be burger meat. One eye was swollen shut but the other one was bright and twinkled with mischief.

"You both look like crap." Bobby shook his head but silently he thought that Dean hadn't looked that carefree since John's death a few month back.

"And you're getting old." Dean didn't miss a beat and went around the car to get their bags. He didn't let Sam carry any of them and Sam didn't really insisted on it so he must be hurting pretty badly.

_Figures,_ Bobby sighed. _They're big boys now. Only remembering their Uncle Bobby when they need a place to hole up for a while._

Not that he minded, he just wished they would swing by more often and not only when they were half dead, that was.

"Dinner's ready." Bobby led the way inside. Neither of the boys seemed to be in immediate danger just battered and sore and the best care he could provide them was a good meal and some shuteye.

Moving like an old man Sam followed Bobby to the kitchen. His movements became instantly lighter when he caught the smell coming out of pot on the stove.

"Is that ...?" He sniffed and his face lit up. "That's your special stew, isn't it?"

"Thought you could use something warm." Bobby shrugged and hoped his cap and beard hit most of his emotions.

"I'll just bring our stuff upstairs" Dean announced already halfway up the stairs and Bobby couldn't think of anything to stop him. "And then you've to tell us why the special treat with the stew. Nobody is dying here, right?"

"I'm just trying to be nice, boy." Bobby shouted after him and stirred the stew so he didn't have to look Sam in the eye. In his head he counted the seconds. One for Dean to finish the stairs, two and three for him to reach the room the boys had used since they had been kids. Four to open the door. Five to ten to stare.

It took him another thirty seconds to make it back to the kitchen. Time enough for Bobby to hand Sam three plates, spoons and the basket with bread. The steaming pot of stew sat in the middle of the table when Dean reappeared in the door.

"Ehm, Bobby?"

Bobby filled the plates and didn't look at Dean. But he could feel the younger man behind him shifting from one foot to the other, searching for words.

"Sit, before it gets cold." He sat a plate in front of Sam who looked confused at his brother and then at Bobby.

"There is a bed in our room." Dean finally managed to say.

"It's for sleeping." Bobby filled the last plate and mentioned Dean to sit down already. Despite his fear that this would go south in a second and the brothers would start running Bobby couldn't deny his amusement. The look on Dean's face, oh boy.

"It's one bed." Dean pointed out and now Sam made a really good impression of a deer in the headlights.

"It's a big bed." Bobby shrugged. And it really was. Big and comfortable, with fresh sheets and fluffy pillows, Bobby never had paid more for a piece of furniture in his life and it was worth every cent.

"It's still _one_ bed." Dean reminded him holding up a finger to make his point. "Two people, two beds." He gestured between himself and Sam who hadn't said a word yet. But he made a strangled noise.

"Would you sit down already?" Bobby used his best John Winchester voice and with that Dean flopped down on the chair. "You two haven't used the second bed since you were teenagers."

"What?" Sam brought the word out as if it inflicted physical pain on him. It probably did.

"I'm sick of waking up from one of your heavy asses falling out of bed. So I figured we could end the charade and get you two a real bed."

The color of their faces turned from shocked pale to embarrassed red and Bobby held a hand up to calm them down. "I never heard anything else and I don't want to hear anything else."

Adjusting his cap again he breathed in relief. That went better than he'd expected. Probably they were just too shocked to run yet but it was a start.

"The stew is getting cold." Bobby took a spoonful and focused on his plate.

"You know?" Sam finally managed actual words.

"How long?" Dean asked at the same time staring at Bobby as if he pondered on bringing out the holy water.

"Did you even listen to me?" Bobby shook his head in amusement. "I know you haven't used the second bed since you were teenagers?" He slowly repeated his words and then put another spoon full of stew in his mouth. "And just in case you two idjits haven't figured it out yourselves, it's okay."

They ate in silence which was uncomfortable at first but after a few minutes the Winchesters relaxed slightly. Or the pain and exhaustion just took their toll on them.

After dinner Dean offered Sam the first shower. An offer Sam took without arguing. He simply made his way upstairs, bent to the side and with support from the banister.

"He okay?" Bobby asked as soon as Sam was out of earshot.

"Some bruised rips." Dean let water in the sink but his eyes were on the ceiling in the direction of the bathroom door that creaked shut in that moment. "Maybe a cracked one. Nothing serious."

"You?" Bobby avoided to study Dean's abused face.

"You know me." Dean flashed him his blinding smile or at least half of it. "I can take a few hits."

Upstairs the shower started.

"Did Dad know?"

"Hell, no." Bobby took the first plate from Dean and toweled it. "Why do you think I waited to pull this stunt until … now." He barely avoided hitting the other elephant in the room and silently cursed at himself.

They finished the dishes and then Dean took his shower. When he came out of the bathroom Bobby was already there providing them with painkillers and ice-packs.

Sam lay in the bed, so close to the edge that he was in real danger of falling out and judging by the look on Dean's face he intended to do the same on the other side of the bed.

Bobby rolled his eyes.

"Take this." He handed Dean an ice-pack for his face. "And Sam? Scoot over before you fall out. Your ribs wouldn't like it and like I said, I'm sick of your heavy asses falling out of the bed."

Bobby didn't wait till they came out of their stupor. With a grumbled "Night." he closed the door.

tbc


	2. Chapter 2

The Winchester slept in the next day. Due to their injuries or just because they weren't sure how to face him, Bobby wasn't sure.

However, when Sam came down the stairs Bobby had coffee ready and bacon in the pan.

"Morning." Without meeting his eye Sam poured himself some coffee and sat down with a sigh at the table.

"Dean still sleeping?" Bobby set a glass of water and the bottle with pills in front of Sam. "Scrambled eggs?"

"Should be here any minute." Sam answered the first question and took a pill. "Scrambled eggs sound good." He fiddled with his cup and opened his mouth to say something but shut it again without saying a word. Bobby pretended he hadn't noticed.

He'd blindsided the boys yesterday and it would take a while for all of them to adjust to the new situation. They were still there, though.

"Do I smell coffee?" Dean came in, yawning and scratching the back of his head. He hadn't bothered to do anything with his hair yet so it stood out in all directions, taking off years of Dean.

"And bacon?" He added hopefully but then stopped halfway through the kitchen. He bit his bottom lip, then straightened when he'd made up his mind and with one long step he was next to Sam. Nervously his eyes flickered to Bobby before he placed a quick kiss at the corner of Sam's mouth. Sam's eyes went wide but Dean just dropped in the chair next to him. Beside his nonchalant manner Bobby could clearly see his tension.

"I'm disappointed in you, son." Bobby arranged the bacon on their plates but out of the corner of his eye he saw the hurt flashing over Dean's face which was covered up with his cold mask a second later.

"You call that a kiss?" Bobby hurried to say before all the wrong conclusions could settle in in Dean's mind. "Thought the famous Dean Winchester would kiss better than that."

For a second Dean just stared at him and Bobby really considered if hitting him on the head with the frying pan he had still in his hand would help.

Taking the challenge Dean nodded once, then turned to Sam who licked his lips in nervous anticipation.

They kissed. Fisting Sam's hair and using all his skill Dean kissed Sam. And like he wanted to eat him alive Sam was kissing back.

It was a test, Bobby knew that so he featured his expression and poured Dean some coffee as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening right in front of him.

When they broke apart Sam smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry." He mumbled. "You should now better than to challenge him."

"Didn't look like you were that unhappy about it." Bobby reminded him.

The day became a strange mixture of business as usual and testing the boundaries. After breakfast Dean went out to work on the car and Sam settled on the couch with one of Bobby's books.

Bobby had some work to do as well and so they sat in comfortable silence over the morning. Now and then they discussed a topic one of them was reading about just like they had done since Sam had been able to read.

When Dean passed by to get some tools out of the basement Sam followed him with his eyes. Nothing special about that, Sam's eyes had been on his brother since the day he'd opened them for the first time but now he allowed them to show a layer of affection which had been hidden until now. Or at least had been hidden from Bobby and everybody else who knew they were brothers. For a second Bobby wondered if that was what they looked at each other in private but dismissed that thought quickly. That was none of his business.

On his way back outside Dean stopped to bent over the back of the couch and said something in a low voice into Sam's ear. Bobby didn't understand the words, they weren't meant for him anyway. Dean placed a quick peck on Sam's cheek and with soft laughter he went outside.

"Sorry." Feeling Bobby's eyes on him Sam blushed and ducked behind his book. For a man his size he made a pretty good job of disappearing behind that book.

Bobby sighed.

"I said it's okay." He scratched his beard not sure what to say. "I love you like my own son. Both of you. And I want you to be happy. If this …" He made a general gesture in Sam's direction. "If this is what makes you happy, than be it."

Sam sat up and planted his feet on the floor. "We weren't sure how you'd take the whole gay thing let alone the … incest part." His gaze dropped to his hands gangling between his knees. When he looked up again he had a sad smile on his lips. "Honestly? We expected more yelling."

"I will start yelling if you two idjits start doing it on the kitchen table." Bobby threatened which coaxed an open smile out of Sam.

There was one thing, though, that had bothered Bobby since he had figured out what kind of relationship his surrogate sons had. That wasn't his business but he wondered.

"Just ask." Apparently Sam could read him like an open book.

"I get that Dean's flirting with girls is some kind of diversionary tactic." Bobby started not sure if he really wanted to know. "But sometimes …" He had no idea how to put his concern in words. This was Dean they were talking about.

"Sometimes he sleeps with a girl." Sam finished the sentence for him. He leaned back giving his ribs some room.

"Is he cheating on you, boy?" Bobby asked and couldn't help but wonder how in the world he had ended up discussing Sam's sexual relationship with his brother.

"No! It's not like that." Sam looked at him for a moment and Bobby was sure that he would tell him to fuck off. But then he made himself more comfortable on the couch and looked up at the ceiling. When he spoke his voice was warm and soft and full of love.

"I'm not gay." He began. "I think I'm only gay …"

"For your brother." Bobby finished the sentence for him.

"When you're saying it, it sounds three times more wrong." Sam chuckled and Bobby relaxed a bit. Sam would get to the point in his own time.

"Dean has always been bi." Sam continued after a moment. "When he was a teenager he tried to convince himself that he didn't like boys by sleeping with girls. Then he tried to convince himself that he didn't like his own brother in an inappropriate way by sleeping with more girls. Man, have I been jealous." He shook his head in bitter amusement.

"We knew it was wrong but we always ended up together anyway. When I left for Stanford we tried to get over it. I had Jess and Dean … Dean experimented. Gained a few interesting skills that way." He smiled dreamily.

"Boy, there are pictures I don't want to have in my head." Bobby shuddered and wondered if it was too early for a healthy dose of whiskey.

"Anyway." Sam sobered. "Sometimes Dean is craving something I can't give to him."

"That's were the girls come in." Bobby guessed and realized that the relationship the brothers had was more twisted than Gordian knot.

The look Sam gave him was hard as steel like he dared Bobby to say a wrong word, to judge this.

"There are very few things Dean wants for himself, very few things he allows himself to want." Sam said in a low voice gaze fixed on Bobby. "At first he denied himself what he needed. Didn't want to … you know."

Bobby knew. Dean would suffer in silence if only Sam was save and happy. His loyalty bordered on self-destructive, suicidal even, when it came to Sam.

"The first time I simply threw him out of the room and told him that he could come back after he'd fucked a girl." Sam blushed and avoided to meet Bobby's eye now.

"And you're okay with that?"

"Don't mistake sex for love. Dean always comes back to me and the make-up sex is totally worth it." Now Sam's grin made him really uncomfortable.

"Great." Bobby muttered. "More pictures I don't want to have in my mind."

They fell silent for a moment while Bobby tried to wrap his mind around the new facts.

"Are you happy?" He finally asked.

"Yes." Prompt and sure and that was all he needed to know.

"Good." Bobby turned his attention back to the book in front of him. "I could use some help with this translation."

"Sure." Sam took the chair next to him and they stuck their heads together like they used to when Sam had been younger.

The passage which was giving Bobby a headache had been written by somebody who hadn't been that familiar with Latin and on top of that he was using some obscure dialect which didn't make it easier to translate.

Absorbed in their work both of them startled when suddenly a plate with sandwiches was placed in front of them.

"Dude, careful with that." Sam put the plate on a note he wasn't using anymore and tried to rub the strain of mayonnaise from the old pages they were translating. With questionable success.

"I asked you twice where to put it." Dean said around a mouth full of sandwich. He sat down in a chair and propped his feet on the edge of the desk.

Bobby sat back and took a bite of his sandwich. If Dean put his mind on it he could put together some decent stuff. Over their meal Bobby listened to the familiar banter between the boys.

The bed had been the right call, he decided satisfied with himself.

tbc


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few days the boys became more comfortable with showing affection in front of Bobby. They never repeated something like that kiss, that had been a bit over the top but Bobby had nobody to blame but himself for that, and a sweet peck now and then they were all okay with that. It was the little things Bobby noticed know which they had suppressed in the past. At least in his presence and for sure in the presence of their father. The way they stood shoulder to shoulder or hip to hip when they were sitting on the couch. The way they touched, they seemed in constant contact now. A brush of their hands, a pat on the shoulder, the leaning against each other.

Bobby knew they had always considered his place a save haven where they could let their guard down and relax. Seeing them now Bobby realized he had never seen them really relaxed before.

One evening he grabbed two beers and went outside where Dean was tinkering with his car.

"Here, thought you could use a break." Bobby offered him a beer which he took with a grin. His face was healing nicely and it wouldn't be long until the brothers would leave, Bobby knew that much but he hoped with all cards on the table now they would swing by more often.

They sat down on the hood of some junker and nursed the beers in silence while Bobby tried to figure out how to say what he wanted to say.

"Dean, I'm sorry." Bobby began and instantly the tension in Dean was back. It radiated out of him but he played it cool like always, patiently waiting for Bobby to continue.

"Seeing you and Sam …" Playing for time Bobby took another sip.

"I know, Bobby." His voice was dead, defeated and for a second he simply collapsed. "Knowing and actual seeing are two different things." He sounded close to tears but Bobby couldn't really tell because Dean's gaze was fixed on nothingness in the other direction. "You have to be disgusted."

"That wasn't what I wanted to say." Bobby started but Dean interrupted him.

"I know what you want to say." With angry determination he finished his beer and straightened. "Don't worry, it's okay. I'll get Sammy and we'll be out of your hair in a minute."

He pushed himself to his feet but stopped after a step. With his back to Bobby he asked: "Is it okay to call sometimes?"

His voice was so low Bobby wasn't sure he had caught the words correctly. Of course Dean interpreted the second he needed to comprehend the words in his own way.

"Okay." Dean nodded. "Clean cut, I got it. I'm sorry. You won't hear from us ever again."

"Dean, stop!" Bobby commanded and Dean stopped dead in his tracks. "I'm not throwing you out, son."

Baffled Dean turned towards him. "But you said …" He didn't have the strength to cover up the hurt in his eyes.

"Dammit boy, would you shut up for a second and listen to me?" Bobby sighed. He shouldn't be surprised that Dean expected him to be disgusted, to throw them out of the house and out of his life. Since Sam and Dean had started their relationship they must have thought about the moment somebody found out.

Oh, Bobby could picture John's reaction. But seeing Dean so easily assuming that Bobby would react in the same way, even after days of proving otherwise, it broke his heart. And it was one more reason why he had to apologize.

Bobby gestured him to come back and reluctantly Dean sat down once again on the hood of the junker.

"I always thought that you and Sam feel safe her." Bobby started over.

"We do." Dean whispered.

"You better." Bobby finished his beer and set the bottle on the ground. "But I never realized how much energy it sucks out of you two to pretend that you are nothing more than brothers. Seeing you know." Bobby sighed. "I'm sorry, I could have given you the freedom to be yourselves years ago."

"Sure." Dean shook his head in amusement. "Dad would have loved the bed."

"Yeah, couldn't have pulled that stunt." Bobby grinned when he pictured John's face if he had discovered the double bed for his sons. "He would have shot me on the spot."

"No kidding. I don't even want to think about what he would have done to me and Sammy." He trailed off. Living in constant fear that their own father would find out, Bobby didn't want to picture that.

"That's another reason I want to apologize for waiting so long." Bobby admitted. "But to be honest, I didn't know how to bring it up and I feared how you would react."

"Thanks, Bobby." And this time there was no doubt, his voice was raspy from emotion and he was on the brink of tears.

He drew the younger man in a one-arm hug. "You and Sam are the closest thing I have to family. You are always welcome here."

With that he grabbed the empty beer bottles and went back inside. Dean would follow when he was ready.

Bobby passed the study and of course it took Sam one look at the beer bottles and one at Bobby's face to ask: "Something wrong?"

The tone alone told Bobby that he was about to repeat the conversation he just had with Dean. Wrong conclusions included. Bobby couldn't blame them, they probably had been steeling themselves for years for the disgust and rejection they expected.

"Nothing is wrong, Sam." Bobby hurried to say and nodded in the direction of the door. "But I think somebody needs a hug."

Sam frowned at him but went outside. Bobby heard Dean protesting against the attempted hug even in the kitchen. When he glanced through the window he saw the brothers sitting on the hood of the junker, shoulder to shoulder. Bobby couldn't hear what Dean was saying but he saw the awe on Sam's face. He quickly ducked behind the curtain when the brothers turned towards the house. For a second they looked like little boys who couldn't believe that Santa hadn't forgotten them this year.

Then they looked at each other, just staring for a long moment, before they closed their eyes and met in a passionate kiss. Suddenly feeling like an intruder Bobby retreated to his study where his work waited for him.

"Idjits." Bobby smiled.


End file.
